The If/Then Game

Note: This has nothing to do with the railroad, this is just some of my middle of the night musings.

     All women play this game, some are amateurs, some are professionals, but there aren't a whole lot of women I know that don't play to some extent.  Here is how the game works; a seemingly innocuous occurrence turns into sheer panic and we have thought through the consequences of this one event for the next several months (if you are an amateur) to next several years (if you are a professional).  I fall somewhere in the middle depending of course on what is causing me to panic.
The one thing I realized when I was musing over this topic, was that we could channel this idea into some great job opportunities.  So lets look at some circumstances and where they could lead in life. 

     The first one we will visit is the impending snow storm.  Weathermen love to do these up to sound like the end of the world, so there are a few women who will go into a panic and start the if/then game.  If the weatherman does a good enough job a man might even get into it a little.  Lets examine the difference.
Man:Hmmm IF there is a big snow storm tomorrow THEN I will be shoveling snow tomorrow. (If  the man is really concerned then he might pick up an extra 6 pack on the way home.) 

Woman :  OMG IF it snows tomorrow, THEN I will have to drive to work in it, THEN I will wreck, OMG THEN will the insurance cover the damage, IF it doesn't, THEN where will I get the money, OMG  THEN how will I get to work, IF I can't get to work THEN I will get fired!  IF I get fired, THEN how will I make the house payment!

      Notice the difference.  Now this may not send all women into a panic, and some men pride themselves in their snow removal prowess, those men however say things more like "I get to use my new snow blower"  Not the same game, they just get to play with their new toy.

     Now that example is at least a semi legitimate reason to go into full if/then mode.  Lets look at an example that may be a little more benign. Lets say you call your significant other and say, "hey I am going to stop and have a drink with some friends on the way home, I will be a little late"

Man: IF she stops for a drink, THEN I will have the house to myself when I get home.  (In this example the worst the man may think is, "dang, hope there is something microwavable in the fridge")

Woman:  IF he stops to get a drink THEN he won't be sober when he drives home, THEN he will get a DUI, OMG  IF he gets a DUI he will lose his license, THEN he will lose his job.  IF he loses his job, THEN how will he find another one without a car and with a DUI on his record. OMG IF he can't find a job, THEN we will have to sell the house!!

or perhaps this will be the Woman's reaction.

Woman:  IF he is stopping to get a drink, THEN he might meet someone, IF he meets someone, THEN he will have an affair, IF he has an affair, THEN he may divorce me, IF he divorces me, THEN the children won't have a father around to take care of them!!

Now you understand?  Now these are all examples of professional if/then-ers.  Chances are most woman fall short of getting to the sell the house part.  These little panic attacks can come from anything, a political agenda, your neighbors cat, the fast food joint they are putting in town and so on.  Most women will have these little panics, realize they are silly, and resume their normal sanity. A few will drag it out a bit longer but most never more than a day or so.  So if you are involved with a woman in any way, and she has an if/then panic, the best thing you can do is wait, silently if at all possible.  She will figure it out and go on her merry way and you will be standing there slack jawed trying to figure out what just happened and if you are in trouble for anything (If you stayed quiet, probably not) 

     So after I started thinking about this little game, I thought "wow, this would be great if we could channel it better!"  I think if we could channel this talent better we could be great civil engineers, city disaster planners, architects  etc.  Think about it; IF we build a new hospital, THEN there will be more traffic, IF there is more traffic, THEN we will need better roads, IF we put in new roads and a new hospital, THEN there will be more jobs, IF there are more jobs, THEN we will need more housing!

     IF there is a hurricane, THEN the electric will go out, IF the electric goes out, THEN people won't be able to get clean water....

     IF we put a support here, THEN we can open this wall up, IF we open this wall up, THEN we can add more counter space.....

I am sure you get the idea.


I hope you have enjoyed this installation of midnight musings, hopefully I will be back on days in December and we can go back to talking about railroading.

Deer, Derailments and the Dead of Night

     Lets start with the deer, they are huge here!  I am working in mid-Ohio and if anyone is looking for a good place to find a trophy buck, they should look no further than mid-Ohio.  One of the guys here showed me a picture of a buck he shot locally and it scored a 179 on the Boone and Crocket scale.  The antlers were as big around as my wrist!  I have not seen any that big but there is a beautiful 8 point that hangs around the yard and a few smaller bucks as well.  The sheer body size is amazing, even the does are the size of a small pony.  I guess that's what they mean by "corn fed"

     Now to the derailments, we have had two in the past two weeks here and the damage this equipment can do always amazes me.  One truck comes off, grabs the rail next to it, and pulls the whole track over for about 300', ties and all.  The rail looked like spaghetti when the conductor finally stopped.  It is one of the things that we need to remember out here, this is dangerous work and one small "oooppps" can cause major damage and major injury.  I know we preach safety but sometimes I think we forget just how powerful this equipment is.  In the above example the cars were moving at about 5mph.  At 5mph we can bend steel and rip ties out of the ground, it's not the speed that kills out here, it's weight.  One of our road engines is around 350 tons, that's 700,000lbs! This is an unforgiving environment and I pray to God that I never have to deal with the death of a coworker out here.  I know a lot of stories, but I don't want to be the one that has to knock on someone's loved ones door. 

     And finally, the dead of night.  I have been working all overnights mostly 12 hour shifts.  For my first part of training I was always with someone, but now they have turned me loose on my own.  This gives me a lot of time... in the dead of night....to think.  This is never a good thing, and I am sure every married man that just read that went "uh oh", yea I know.  It seems 4am when the crews are in lunch and I am sitting alone in my truck is about the worst time.  I have started reading my Bible, which helps, but I am starting to be a pro at worrying about my life.  Trying to figure out what you are supposed to be as a wife and mother while working 400 miles from home in the middle of the night, well lets just say, I am pretty confused.  On one hand I like my job, my husband is proud of me, and he is pretty big on the income that I bring in, on the other hand I haven't seen the man in 3 weeks, my house is a wreck and I haven't cooked a real meal in 6 months.   Here's hoping that they keep me busy at 4am. For my sanity and probably my husbands to.

Sorry no pictures of the deer or the derailments, but working in the dead of night does not make for great pictures.  For my foamer friends, Canadian National has been sending some beautiful brand spanking new engines through Ohio, they are dead in tow, but they are very shiny!

Lessons In Leadership

     During my 2 weeks in Jacksonville, FL for my front line supervisors training we were voluntold to participate in a community service event on Saturday morning.  Perhaps working for the railroad has skewed my perception some, as we are often voluntold to do things, but this really didn't bother me.  It was for a good cause, and I am missing doing physical labor.  We were tasked with helping an organization called Dignity U Wear (http://www.dignityuwear.org/)  They are an organization that helps everyone from wounded warriors to battered wives and everyone in between to be dressed well for interviews and work situations.  Since they spend so much time giving people makeovers, we were going to give their warehouse a makeover. 
   
     We all showed up at 0730 on  Saturday morning, got our matching t-shirts, name badges and a light breakfast.  There were cameras everywhere and some newspaper reporters as well.  When we were called to order there was the usual handshaking photo ops and that included CSX's VP of transportation, Cindy Sanborn.  Many of us little folks in the crowd assumed that Ms. Sanborn would get the pictures taken and then be off to her ivory tower, and we would be proved very wrong.  Along with Ms. Sanborn there were some other higher level officers of the company and there were also families and kids that other employees had brought with them to support a good cause. 

     All day everyone there worked their butts off to help this great organization, we painted, we pulled stumps, we scraped old paint off of concrete blocks and so on and so forth.  It was hot, and we were all sweaty... well with the exception of 2.  There were 2 guys who stood and watched all day, never picking up a paint brush or a scraper.  These 2 guys are supposed to be the mentors of our management trainee program and our leaders.  When asked why they weren't working they responded that "we are a higher level than you"  which is true, but they were not above some of the people there. When the VP is sweaty and dirty, you don't have an excuse. That didn't seem to matter to these 2, but I can proudly say the rest of the people that showed up worked really hard, from the VP's on down to the kids.  When we were done we had painted the entire warehouse, inside and out!   No one other than those 2 "leaders" left clean and dry, we were all dirty and sweaty.  And we were all proud of what we had accomplished that day.

    So to those aspiring leaders, don't stand there and watch.  Some of the comments I heard afterward about these 2 were pretty nasty, and whether they deserved them or not, they chose to say "Do what we say, not what we do" and they never even had to open their mouths.  If you are acting as a leader know that you are being watched by your subordinates and even if you are not the top tier there is always someone looking to you to show by example.  This can be an old head teaching a lemon head, or a lemon head showing his children what he has learned in his life, or a new manager getting their hands dirty.  We are all leaders to someone.

Sorry there aren't any pictures, I was pretty busy and figured I could find some online since there were so many people running around with cameras. Turns out I was wrong, but if you can find some pictures I would love to see them, and please check out Dignity U Wear they are a pretty cool organization. 

Trainmaster Trainee and Hotel Living

This is a picture of the Main St. Bridge in Jacksonville, I am staying right behind where I took this pic from

 

      Sorry I  haven't written I a while, I have taken on a new role here at CSX and I wasn't sure what the rules were about social media and posting about my experience.  As I expected, they are fairly strict and I am limited as to what I can or can't put on a blog.  Here is what I can tell you. I have gone back to the dark side (transportation) and am now working as a trainmaster trainee.  I do miss the signal department, but this job is pretty challenging in its own right and I am nervous and excited about it.

     This program is 8 months long and none of that time is at home.  I traveled a fair amount with the signal department and add the last few months of this and I am now a platinum or diamond member with 3 different hotel groups (Marriott, Hyatt and IHG)  I can say with confidence that if you want to know about hotel living I can give you the ins and outs of it.  I have spent time in Atlanta, GA, Avon, IN, Jacksonville, FL and Ontario, OH and that is just in the last 3 months.  Since I feel incredibly qualified to comment on hotel living, I thought I would make a list of a few tips that would have made my life a bit easier.

1.  If you can stay in a Marriott, DO IT!
   It doesn't matter if it is one of there more reasonably priced hotels like the Fairfield or one of their premiere resorts, Marriott knows how to take care of its customers.  The beds are always super comfy and the rooms are always clean.  Oh yea and they give you cookies!

2.  I don't care how lazy you are feeling, room service is just not worth it. 
   This morning I decided to have a lazy Sunday morning and called down for a cheese omelet, crispy bacon, OJ and some rye toast.  I expected it to cost more than Denny's but $30 for breakfast almost made me lose my appetite, and they forgot my toast!  The omelet had just a teeny bit of shredded cheese and the grits were instant, it did come with the smallest bottle of tabasco ever.

    
3. Don't leave anything valuable in your room.
    This seems obvious but really, even just to let the maids in.  Take laptops, watches, purses etc. and lock them in your trunk if you have one.  If not and you are only going to be there a few days, pass on the maid service, you probably don't have one at home and you can live without one for a few days in a hotel.

4. Check your receipts at check out!
     Again, it may seem obvious but there have been many over charges or extra charges show up on a hotel bill.  Once you sign your name, your done.  A new trick hotels are trying is "I am sorry we don't print receipts anymore, I can email it to you"  Say yes please, and then check it before you leave. 

5. Your bed is always better.
    I have heard a few people lately tell me how "cool" it must be to get to travel so much, or how "exciting" it must be to stay in so many different hotels, I can say with confidence they are wrong.  It is "cool" and "exciting" to stay in a hotel for a few weeks, not a few months.  My bed is still my favorite (Marriott's are a close second)  They also must be forgetting that I work most days, and most days I work 12+ hours (oh yea salary and no hours of service!)  I have a little time to see the sights, but mostly I am working and sleeping.

I hope to be able to add some more to my blog that probably will not be directly railroad related, but I can post some generalizations and answer broad questions about how this place works.

The Dangers of Volunteering

     When I was a kid we had two choices, volunteer for a job or be assigned one.  It didn't take us to long to realize that if you were the first to volunteer you usually got your pick of jobs.  This mentality has kept on into my adult life.  I generally volunteer for everything, call me a kiss up, or a brown noser but really I am trying to get the good job and sticking you with the crappy one.  So this year when they started planning our second half safety certification and they asked for volunteers, naturally my hand went up.  Then I was appointed the lead of this team.  Hmmm, I thought, this isn't how this is supposed to go, but since I had already jumped in head first I figured I would go with it.   

     Then on our first call, we came up with some ideas of classes we would like to have and again were asked to volunteer to take one class on to research and again I spoke up first.  Surely I thought this would go better. I volunteered to build a box filled with dirt showing a ground go from one wire to another, this sounded much more interesting than researching standards.  So far so good, I build a dirt box and the other suckers get stuck researching standards,  jumper policies and the like. 

     We have our second call and everything is going great, we are paring down the classes and figuring out logistics and so on.  Then the boss man doesn't ask, he tells me that I will be teaching a class on metering and grounds to go along with the dirt box. What?!?! eeekkk.  Folks let me remind you that I have a little less than 2 years in this department, I am one of about 5 females and I am blonde and polish.  I will be teaching this class to the entire east region construction, not new guys but 30+ year guys who were probably working out here before I was born.  Oh yes, and did I forget to mention I have to create this class?!?! 

     I will have some help from managers, and I am sure to learn a lot from this experience, but to say I am a little nervous about this would be a gross understatement.  I tell this story just in case you have grown up in a household like mine, where volunteering to vacum was much better than being assigned toilet cleaning.  Sometimes volunteering doesn't work out quite the way you planned, be cautious in your hand raising. 
    

Dumpster Diving

      Yea I said it, dumpster diving.  Thanks to the track department, I spent my afternoon taking the trash that they put in the dumpster out.  Why in the world would you take trash OUT of a dumpster?  I know this is what your thinking so I will explain.  You see we (the signal department) has ordered a dumpster from a company that is for concrete ONLY.  My foreman gets very nasty phone calls from the lady at the dumpster place if she finds wood or regular trash in the concrete dumpster.  We had attempted to make this clear by hanging a sign, and speaking with the Roadmaster. Apparently, we needed to resort to a more obvious form of communication.

     Please note the big spray painted sign that says CONCRETE!  There is a matching one on the side.  Hopefully this will clearly convey what the contents of this dumpster should be, and prevent nasty phone calls from the dumpster lady and me climbing in any more dumpsters...blech

 

     We also got to see the Dominion Power guys in action today, and I have to say they are braver than I am.  Here is a picture of them. Please notice the lake that they are in.  To me electricity + water = bad idea, but they put on some really big gloves and had our service swapped in about 20 minutes.  Kudos to the Dominion guys!

 

 

 

And to follow up on a previous post, my horse is still sick, and we have a diagnosis.  She has Alopecia Areata, which is an auto immune disorder that attacks her skin cells.  Not good, she is on steroids for about 2 months, if she doesn't founder we will be looking at immune supplements and a lot of praying.  She also looks pretty gross, but she is starting her very own collection of blankets, and I think she has more than me right now. 

 

One more note, NEW DUCK DYNASTY TONIGHT!!

So What do you DO in the Hotel

     Since we had a pretty boring half, I thought I would talk a little about what we do in the time we have sitting in the hotels in the evenings.  We spend at least 16 nights a month in a hotel and recently we have been spending a bit more than that.  So other than racking up some serious hotel points, what do you do?
     Well, I go to school online, which does pass the time, but it is also fairly boring. The boys on my crew all have high end RC cars.  Every single member of the crew with the exception of me, has one.  Even the brand new guy we got last week!  His had been in the garage for a year, but he was happy to bring it out and play with everyone.  The reason I don't have one is simple economics, I already have one very expensive hobby in horses, I don't need another one.  They are pretty cool, and they get new bodies, and tires and motors etc. to make them faster or prettier (I should probably say bad ass looking, not prettier)
     The other thing we have decided to do is run in the Marine 1/2 marathon in May.  I did decide to participate in this one.  I am not sure what I was thinking when I said I would, probably "hey I will look good in a bikini this summer!" So we started our training last week. I may need to quit smoking for this one.  The marathon training schedules all assume that you can run for 30 minutes straight! So sadly I am in the marathon "pre-training" stage. This will be much harder mentally and physically, but also much cheaper.  I already own sneakers, there is a treadmill at the hotel, and entrance into the marathon is only 75 bucks.  I am still waiting to discover this "runners high",  I think all those runners are damned liars trying pretend that running is more fun than real sports like football or baseball. 
     I actually have off all week so I will be working on my science experiment and sitting around in my pjs.  I have some scrap cable in the truck and need to run to the hardware store for a good sheet of plywood and some screws, probably have to get out of my pjs for that one though.  (you know you are being lazy when you type this and think, well I could just throw my coveralls on over the pjs and no one would know!)  I also plan on going to the outdoor show in Fishersville, hubby and I never got a honeymoon (thank you railroad schedule) so we are thinking of taking a hunting trip in the fall.